I didn't write this football season because I was heavily involved in my high school class reunion plans. And once the event was over, I needed to play MAJOR catch-up with Britney Spears' legal issues. Which left little time for writing.
Anyway, I was at my friend Dana's New Year's Day party today when a friend reminded me of a "poem" I wrote last year and e-mailed to my pals around town.
It's hard to believe I completely forgot about it, as it truly captured the spirit of the season, at least around the Salfino household, circa Christmas 2006. What I present to you is a cleaned-up version of what I sent my North Jersey friends, with none, or hardly any, of the four-letter words that liberally peppered the piece last year. I guess... no, actually, I'm certain I was pretty p.o.'d when I originally wrote it:
Christmas 2006Twas the day after Christmas, and all through the house
were gifts no one gave two shits about,
--they had a computer mouse.
The stockings lay empty, chucked on a chair,
where they would stay until Mom wanted to sit there.
The children were nestled, around the TV instead
of playing with new stuff, or each other, God forbid.
A ticket was placed carefully on the windshield of the car
cuz it was alternate-side-of-the-street parking, suck-ar!.
The cleaning was endless, nothing got done without a fight,
Merry Christmas, dorks,
Now get the hell outta my sight.
Much has changed in a year. Because two days after Christmas 2007, instead of writing a foul-mouthed/tempered bit o' poetry to relieve my stress, I had a nervous breakdown/meltdown, and announced that some modifications were going to be adopted around here if they wanted a mother who didn't appear to be afflicted with both rabies and Tourrettes.
And, in a further dash of how far we've come, this year we
didn't get a parking ticket. Oh, wait--we did. Only it was a few days before Christmas, not the day after. Christmas week wasn't without incident though. To wit:
The dead pet frog was carefully removed from its home
Hopefully, for our sickly hamster, not a harbinger of things to come.Okay, upon review, maybe there's been very little change. Nonetheless, Happy New Year! Here's to a great 2008! (Insert smiley face!)
